Enough of Self: A Call to True Contentment

An Essay by Wesley Strackbein

It’s time for a reckoning of our souls.

Let us not kid ourselves that we all selfishly struggle, at one level or another, with discontentment.

You’ve heard it, or said it yourself before — perhaps this very day or week: If only I had more money. If only I had more time. If only I had more talents and energy. If only I had a nicer car or house. If only my church situation was better. If only I was married to the spouse of my dreams. If only my kids would behave and follow the Lord. If only God would open my womb and give me a child. If only my husband was as wise and shepherdly as Charles Spurgeon and as dashing as Mr. Darcy. If only my wife was as emotionally stable and focused as the Proverbs 31 woman. If only my parents were more understanding of my struggles. If only my job was more rewarding. If only this physical sickness or that troubling handicap was healed. If only the vicious persecution I’m under, spread by lies and behind-the-back gossip, would come to an end.

With the Mr. Darcy outburst excluded, the yearnings just cataloged may have a legitimate place in our hopes for the future. It’s not wrong to desire good things, and even intently pray and seek after them, but the moment we pine on about even noble aspirations, as if we’ve somehow been shortchanged by God on the timing or outcome we think we deserve, we have sinned and lack the virtue of contentment. We’ve stood in judgment over God’s perfect governance of the world — as if we know what’s better for us, than He does, as our all-wise Shepherd.

Then there are the wicked things we lust after and wrong deeds we commit to stroak our malcontented egos: pridefully flaunting ourselves; quarreling or fighting to get our way; dishonoring our parents and other rightful authorities; desiring a man or woman who doesn’t belong to us, stooping to any manner of sexual deviancy; longing for the praise and recognition of men; demanding unchecked power; pursuing greedy gain; conniving to harm others; sowing discord and tearing down our fellow man through gossip; spreading falsehoods; venting unrighteous anger toward those we love or loathe; and making idols of anything that draws us away from the One True God.

These sins — and all others one might name — are creatures of discontentment. They are spawned from hearts that chafe that the lot God has given us and the laws He’s prescribed to govern our conduct are inadequate. They’re simply not “good enough” to satisfy our cravings for something more.

Contentment Defined and Explained

To better come to grips with this persistent human struggle, we need to grasp what contentment means. Noah Webster’s 1828 Dictionary gives these helpful definitions:

Content: Rest or quietness of the mind in the present condition; satisfaction which holds the mind at peace, restraining complaint. . . .

Contentment: A resting or satisfaction of mind without disquiet.¹

Jeremiah Burroughs dials the definition in further in his excellent work, The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment, first published in 1651: “Christian contentment is that sweet, inward, quiet, gracious frame of spirit, which freely submits to and delights in God’s wise and fatherly disposal in every condition.”²

With these definitions established, we can now add more meat to the bones.

Contentment is rooted in a steadfast and unshakable trust in God’s ultimate wisdom and all-encompassing sovereignty. It flows from a humble and grateful recognition that God knows what’s best for our lives, and that He will most assuredly bring His plan for us to pass in the time and way which is perfect.

Contentment flows from a cheerful heart of submission to God’s laws, assuming they are wholly just; a cheerful heart of submission to His created order, recognizing that how He made and ordered all things is His sole and rightful prerogative; and a cheerful heart of submission to His providence, acknowledging that how He governs the affairs of men is done for the good of those He loves in accordance with His unchanging and perfect purpose, which was ordained before the foundations of the world.

To be content is to be at peace with God’s plans for us. It is to willingly accept how He created us; whose family He made us a part of; and what nation and cultural context He has placed us in. It is to peacefully embrace His good pleasure in where He has us now, as well as where He will take us in the future.

No matter what valleys and travails God would have us endure, contentment freely and humbly acknowledges that “all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose” (Rom. 8:28), and it prompts true peace in light of this unshakable reality.³

Thomas Watson, whose book The Art of Divine Contentment stands alongside Burroughs’ as an age-old classic on the subject, said it well:

The consideration that there is a decree determining and a Providence disposing, all things that fall out should work our hearts to holy contentment. The wise God has ordered our condition. If He sees that it is better for us to abound, we shall abound. And if He sees that it is better for us to want, we shall want. Be content to be at God’s disposal.⁴

Discontentment: Contentment’s Evil Opposite

With contentment’s definition now fleshed out, we can better understand its evil opposite.

All sin — in one way or another — flows from a heart of discontentment, because it is birthed and fueled by the sentiment that God’s decrees, laws, and providence are in some way inadequate for our self-satisfaction and well-being, which thus leads us to set aside His commands to feed our sinful lusts.

To be discontent is to second-guess God’s plan for us. It is to consider His purpose and ways to be misguided, unfulfilling, and inadequate; and to deem His timing in bringing certain realities to pass to be amiss.

No degree of blessing is ever good enough for the discontented of heart. They will always demand “more, more, more!” and view the good gifts and mercies God grants as less than they need to be fulfilled. This is the story of Adam and Eve in the Garden. God placed them in a paradise without thorns and thistles, blessed with a Tree of Life and fruit in abundance, but they acted with blatant discontent by distrusting God and eating of the Forbidden Fruit. They chose disobedience and death rather than grateful contentment.

Contentment: A Grace that Must Be Learned

This is us today. As inheritors of Adam and Eve’s sin nature, we — when yielded to our flesh — are never satisfied. Left to ourselves, our hearts erupt with discontentment. Christ Jesus pulled no punches when He declared: “. . . out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies” (Matt. 15:19), and the list goes on and on. Not accepting our lot and God’s perfect laws, we seek our own selfish way.

Recognizing our viceful proneness to discontentment, we must grasp the obvious corollary: that the virtue of contentment doesn’t come naturally. It’s a grace that must be learned. Speaking of his own personal journey, the Apostle Paul observed:

[F]or I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. (Phil. 4:11-13)

There is great hope in Paul’s words, for he declares that, with God’s help, we can come to a place of contentment, no matter the circumstances we face. Though we naturally tend to succumb to discontented lusts, the apostle gives us this reassuring truth:

There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it. (1 Cor. 10:13)

‘Run with Patience’: Contentment Is Not Complacency

Before elaborating further on the battle for contentment, it is important that we briefly highlight a clarifying lesson from Paul: that contentment is not to be confused with complacency. The virtue of contentment cannot be used as a diversion to excuse us from rising to our duties and doing what must be done. The same apostle who learned contentment, through thick and thin, spoke against plateauing stagnation and apathetic laziness in the Christian walk.

When Paul was bound as a prisoner in Rome, he wrote to Christians at Philippi of his resolve to keep laboring: “I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus” (Phil. 3:14). His earnest prayer for his fellow believers at Colossae was that they might have ongoing growth and fruitfulness: “That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God; Strengthened with all might, according to his glorious power, unto all patience and longsuffering with joyfulness” (Col. 1:9-11). And Paul’s message to the Ephesian church was no less pointed as he called on believers to actively gird themselves for battle: “Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil” (Eph. 6:10-11).

Complacency finds no place in Paul’s personal testimony or admonitions to his fellow saints, nor is it condoned anywhere else in Scripture. The writer of Hebrews poignantly illustrates how eschewing complacency and embracing contentment are to meld together in the Christian life:

Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider him that endured such contradiction of sinners against himself, lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds. (Heb. 12:1-3)

“Run with patience” is the challenging but hopeful charge. We are to follow the example of Christ who modeled persevering contentment on His road to the Cross, which led to our redemption and His ultimate glory. Four maxims, penned by this writer, give one summary of the goal:

            Be content, but not complacent.

            Be ambitious, yet at ease.

            Persevere, but yet be patient.

            Live in earnest, yet in peace.

Be Content with Your Station: A Defining Struggle of the Ages

The numerous fronts on which the battle between contentment and discontentment is fought are beyond our ability to fully survey, yet we will briefly look at a few that are common to most during some point in their lives.

Square One: Embracing the Creator-Creature Distinction          

Being content with the God-defined boundaries of our station is a defining struggle of the ages. While it manifests itself in different forms over the course of one’s life, where it pertains to God’s fundamental relationship to man, it is square one in the war.

Hearkening back to the Garden of Eden, we are reminded of the fact that Adam and Eve were created by an all-powerful, Eternal God, and yet they were discontent with their station as finite, earthly creatures. Satan’s lie, which they fell for, is that if they ate of the Forbidden Fruit, they would somehow catapult past their state of human dependence and “be as gods” themselves (Gen. 3:5). The immovable reality which they sought to break through — viewed as a “glass ceiling” of sorts by them — is worthy of spelling out. Two propositions undergird the whole matter:

God is sovereign, infinite, holy, perfect, and just in all His ways, and He created man for His glory and for His purpose, providing redemption and eternal life to all who call upon Him in faith.⁵

We are God’s creatures, and as such we are finite, derivative, imperfect, and our purpose as his creatures is to glorify Him and to rejoice in and humbly accept His plan for our lives, looking to Him as the only hope for salvation and fulfillment.⁶

Try as we might, we can never alter this Creator-creature distinction. Though Christ through His sacrifice made a way for fallen men to have restored union with the Godhead, the dividing lines between God and man’s respective stations will stand fast eternally.⁷

Sadly, Satan in his deluded vanity and man in his arrogant folly disdain this truth and wish the world could be otherwise.⁸ At the most basic level, this point of unrest is the seedbed of all discontentment. True contentment, by direct contrast, flows from a proper understanding and willing acceptance of who God is and who we are in relation to Him.

Competing Polls of Discontentment: The Abuse of Power and the Lawless Rejection of Authority

Feed the flock of God which is among you, taking the oversight thereof, not by constraint, but willingly; not for filthy lucre, but of a ready mind; Neither as being lords over God’s heritage, but being ensamples to the flock. (1 Pet. 5:2-3)

For three things the earth is disquieted, and for four which it cannot bear: For a servant when he reigneth; and a fool when he is filled with meat; For an odious woman when she is married; and an handmaid that is heir to her mistress. (Prov. 30:21-23)

In broadening the discussion, what needs to be pointed out is that the tendency we have as sinners to buck God’s order in relation to our station goes way past the Creator-creature distinction and bleeds into other human relationships.

Some defined stations — such as whether we are created male or female — are irrevocable; and others — such as that of husbands and wives, parents and children, servant and masters, elders and congregants, and other duly appointed leaders and those under their governance — may fluctuate and have changing levels of responsibilities and focus, depending on our season of life. Yet all require an adherence to this basic principle: that we must find contentment and seek fulfillment within the jurisdictional boundaries God has established and not seek to thwart or circumvent them or carve out a niche for ourselves apart from the roles He has called us to fulfill.

God’s word and human history are littered with the casualties of failure on both sides of this spectrum.⁹ Untold volumes could be filled with the stories of leaders who have abused their position, going beyond the limited authority that all humans in legitimate leadership possess, as well as those who have wrongly scoffed and rebelled against the rightful authorities whom God has placed over them. Discontentment with God’s defined boundaries fuels all these sins. And sin makes sorting through these relationship issues often messy and extremely difficult.

When we are confronted with such challenges, the human response is often to throw out the baby with the proverbial bathwater. For example, the Scriptures makes plain that “the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church” (Eph. 5:23). So when a husband acts like an ogre, the knee-jerk reaction is often to dispense with God’s word and gravitate toward radical egalitarianism between the sexes. Fewer argue that children should be the equal of parents, or that companies should be led by a pure democracy rather than by a president or CEO, yet the spurning of rightful authority is a rampant trend in our times.

The answer to the problem is not to embrace and us-against-them Marxism or anti-authority egalitarianism, but to call all sides to embrace their legitimate duties and live within the rightful boundaries God has prescribed. In light of this, both male chauvinism and subversive feminism must equally be condemned (1 Pet. 3:1-7). So, too, must elders who wrongly lord over their flock (1 Pet. 5:2-3), as well as church members who proudly and bitterly stir up strife against their leaders (Titus 3:9-11). Fathers who provoke their children to wrath (Eph. 6:4) must be called to repent and take responsibility for their actions, but children who dishonor their parents and seek to usurp their authority must likewise be required to answer for their sinful behavior (Exod. 20:12; Deut. 27:16; Eph. 6:1). Civil officials who abuse their power should be brought to justice (Ex. 23:7; Jer. 22:3-5; Prov. 17:15), but those who thwart legitimate civil authority should be held accountable for their misdeeds as well (Rom. 13:1-4; Heb. 13:17).

This is no mere academic discussion. We all deal daily with facets of this struggle over our conduct, relative to those we answer to or have authority over, and need to examine our hearts and weed out any self-serving discontentment that is there.

Be Content with How God Made You: Your Abilities are Sufficient for the Task

It’s been said countless times: “Oh, I’m not smart or handsome like that guy, or pretty and talented like that girl — God did not make me ‘good enough’!”

It is human nature to compare ourselves to others. And it’s a common sin to discontentedly lament that God could have created us “better.” Yet Scripture plainly condemns this attitude: “Woe to him who strives with his Maker! . . . Shall the clay say to him who forms it, ‘What are you making?’” (Isa. 45:9).¹⁰

The bottom line is this: It’s God’s prerogative to bestow talents and giftings as He sees fit, and we must accept and be content with the allotment we’ve received from Him. While our inherent strengths may be less than another’s, the Wise Creator has made our abilities sufficient to our earthly calling. He didn’t blow it when He formed us, and we have no legitimate right to complain or cast aspersions on our Maker.

When Moses was called by God at the burning bush, he fell prey to this sin. Yet God assured His grumbling servant that the talents he’d been given — though seemingly paltry to Moses — were adequate for what God required of him. The narrative, recorded in Exodus, makes this clear:

And Moses said unto the LORD, “O my Lord, I am not eloquent, neither heretofore, nor since thou hast spoken unto thy servant: but I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue.” And the LORD said unto him, “Who hath made man’s mouth? or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind?  have not I the LORD? Now therefore go, and I will be with thy mouth, and teach thee what thou shalt say.” (Exod. 4:10-12)

As meager as our talents may seem in comparison to others, they perfectly fit us for our life purpose. Thanks be to God for this!

Be Content with Your Financial Estate: Don’t Love Money or Things

God calls men to be diligent in their labors (Prov. 6:6-8; 27:23-24) and to provide for their own (1 Tim. 5:8), and He commends both men and women who are faithful stewards of their earthly possessions (Prov. 22:28; 31:10-31). He also speaks well of men who scrupulously guide their financial affairs so that they are able to pass on an inheritance:  “A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children’s children” (Prov. 13:22).

Having said this, the Scripture is also full of sober warnings against making wealth an idolatry, as well as the futile emptiness it brings when it becomes an obsession. Contentment is called for instead. Consider the following:

He that loveth silver shall not be satisfied with silver; nor he that loveth abundance with increase: this is also vanity. (Eccles. 5:10)

[B]e content with your wages. (Luke 3:14)

But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and raiment let us be therewith content. But they that will be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition. For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. But thou, O man of God, flee these things; and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, meekness. (1 Tim. 6:6-12)

Many ills follow when the pursuit of money and possessions becomes an inordinate focus. Men are often driven to sacrifice precious time that should be spent instead with their families, while their wives expect nicer things, further fueling the problem.

Some grow bitterly envious of what they don’t have. I remember well my late paternal grandfather describing how he watched, in real time, a workforce turn from generally upbeat to fundamentally disgruntled over money and benefits. It happened when the men at the carbon black plant he worked for joined a union. The positive esprit de corps he experienced early on gave way to constant bickering and a selfish sense of entitlement. The mood changed from worker satisfaction, on the whole, to blatant discontentment.

Politicians and governments prey on this sinful proclivity. Pastor Joe Morecraft astutely notes:

Covetousness and envy are the basis for Marxism, Socialism, Fascism, and the big government we have in the U.S. today. When someone is dominated by larceny in the heart, he looks at his neighbor’s property and says to himself: “I wish I had that. If I could get my hands on it, I’d be happy. Maybe I can steal it. Maybe I can get someone to loan me the money to buy it. Or maybe I can get Congress to confiscate it and give it to me.” The civil government’s legalized plundering is motivated by covetousness.¹¹

Being given the largesse of others won’t bring fulfillment. Neither can we buy our way to happiness. A nicer car, house, or bigger bank account won’t bring satisfaction if we make an idolatry of earthly things.

We need to confront such materialistic covetousness, whenever it lurks. To the extent we coddle this form of discontentment, we need to give it the cut and move on.

Be Content with Your Family: Forsaking Fantasy, Embracing Reality

We all know that there is no such thing as a perfect husband or wife. Nor are their perfect parents. The problem comes when we grow discontent with the flawed family we have and covet an idealized alternative.

We need to see this error for what it is: Pride, the wicked parent of discontentment, can easily fill us with an inflated sense of self-importance and the smug belief that we deserve better than what we’ve been given. It can insidiously cloud our judgment and lead us to lust after escapist alternatives to our imperfect family to whom we have sacred, ongoing responsibilities. It can fuel delusional notions of fulfillment, prompting us to resort to self-serving fantasy over God-established reality.

Such ego-driven discontentment must not be dallied with, for if it is not humbly repented of, it can tear our families apart. You know the story: Men wrecking their marriages through their pornography addiction, leaving their wives and children shattered; women idolizing the Mr. Darcy notion of manhood, spurning their imperfect husbands for a man who doesn’t exist; and children expecting Dad and Mom to never err and shamefully rebelling.

This ugly picture often involves adultery, broken homes, and despised parents — consequences that in most instances can be avoided if prideful discontentment is nipped in the bud before wholesale havoc and heartache ensues.

In navigating the escapist fantasy minefield within families, there are cases where gross sin has occurred that require the church and civil government’s careful intervention. Such matters should not be taken lightly and deserve proper and prayerful oversight. Yet, more often than not, selfish discontentment within families can be appropriately addressed through personal humility and repentance, where trust can slowly be rebuilt and hope rekindled.

If you are reading this essay and find yourself struggling on one of these fronts, don’t let the worst happen. Set aside your pride and petty grievances and do the hard work of modeling contentment with the flawed family God has given you. Forsake your escapist fantasies with humble earnestness. Act with patience and forbearance when others don’t measure up to perfection, remembering that you’re not perfect either. It may be hard to take the high road, but you won’t regret it if you do.

In relating to your family, embrace the attributes of true love — not self-appeasing lust — as beautifully described by Paul:

Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails . . . (1 Cor. 13:4-8)¹²

Dear friends, the stakes are too high to bow to selfish fantasy. The Playboy, Pride and Prejudice, and Rebel Without a Cause notions of fulfillment need to be tossed out and firmly forsaken. Don’t flirt with their allurements. Flee them and don’t turn back, for you can’t play with fire and not get burned.¹³

Be Content in Your State of Singleness: Accepting Good on God’s Terms

Singleness can be a hard season to endure when one is not yielded to God’s perfect plan for matrimony. For those who desire marriage, discontentment is an ever-lurking trap that must be guarded against.

I say this from experience. Over the last two decades, I’ve not only observed dozens of men and women struggle on this front, making huge blunders out of prideful impatience, but I have made some of the same errors myself.

Some years ago I watched a man older than me, whom I deeply respected, tumble from sound conviction when an attractive woman of poor character entered his life. Prior to him pursuing a relationship with her, I personally observed him read and memorize Scripture, pray with earnestness, and model leadership in impressive ways. Yet once he was smitten by his new-found flame, reason went out the window, and over time, she drug him down to her level. They were eventually married, but the relationship tragically ended in divorce when her bad character, which had been evident all along, naturally played itself out.

I witnessed another young man of promise, raised by some of the most godly and courageous parents I know, become so desperate to get married that he hastily tied the knot with a woman he had met on the Internet, before really getting to know her. His parents counseled him to wait, but he wouldn’t listen. Marrying her against their will, he reaped a whirlwind of woe. The marriage collapsed in less than two years, and much heartache followed.

I’ve also observed numerous young women willfully look past obvious character flaws in the men who were courting their hand, because they just “had” to get married before they became “old spinsters.” Sadly and predictably, these marriages have spiraled into disaster.

For my own part, I have sought in past years to act with honor and integrity in pursuing marriage, but in looking back now, I see how prideful discontentment colored many of my words and actions and led to humbling failure. I often said the right things, but in my heart of hearts I was not fully at peace with God’s direction. Though blinded to my hubris then, I’m grateful that God forced me to learn important lessons that prodded me toward true contentment.

Our Duty in Singleness: Accept God’s Goodness as He Defines It

What’s beyond question is that discontentment for the unmarried is an abiding temptation. To hold our hearts in check, we need God’s grace. The key lesson we must learn is that the All-Wise Sovereign bestows His favor on His terms, not ours. While God delights in giving good gifts to His children (Matt. 7:7-11), the moment we take umbrage when He doesn’t pigeon-hole His goodness to conform to our selfish expectations, we greatly err. The posture we should assume is to humbly trust God to mete out our portion as He deems best, including where marriage is concerned.

The “good” we think should come is not always what’s best for us, and when the God who knows better than we do wills against our desires, we should bow to Him in reverent contentment. Though God’s program doesn’t always match our personal longings, He is never slack in giving us the blessings He’s promised. This is a message that the oft-murmuring Israelites of the Exodus needed to hear, and Joshua declared as much to them at the close of their 40-year slog through the wilderness: “not one thing hath failed of all the good things which the LORD your God spake concerning you; all are come to pass . . .” (Josh. 23:14).

However disappointed we may be when things don’t go to our liking, we can rest assured that God takes care of His own. The Apostle Paul closed his classic discussion on contentment in Philippians 4 with this hopeful truth: “My God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus” (Phil. 4:19).

The Example of Boaz: A Powerful Witness of Contentment

If you’re struggling as a single person, look to the Book of Ruth for encouragement. The manly contentment of Boaz found there gives a powerful example to follow when the outcome of a marriage pursuit hangs in the balance.

Looking briefly at the account, we learn that Boaz showed great kindness to Ruth, a Moabitess widow, allowing her to glean in his fields and warmly feeding her from his table (Ruth 2). Though she was virtually destitute, he clearly discerned that she was a “virtuous woman” (Ruth 3:11) and desired to marry her.

There were complications, however. As Boaz prepared to seek Ruth’s hand as a kinsman redeemer, he freely acknowledged that another man had a nearer claim to her than he did. Yet he trusted God with the result. His words to Ruth are poignant and instructive:

 . . . it is true that I am thy near kinsman: howbeit there is a kinsman nearer than I.  Tarry this night, and it shall be in the morning, that if he will perform unto thee the part of a kinsman, well; let him do the kinsman’s part: but if he will not do the part of a kinsman to thee, then will I do the part of a kinsman to thee, as the LORD liveth . . . (Ruth 3:12-13, emphasis added)

“Well” was Boaz’s posture, knowing he might not get to marry this woman he so admired, and “well” should likewise be our heart-cry when we face such rejection.

As hard as it may seem — and believe me, I know — contentment requires no less.

Be Content with the Crosses God Calls You to Bear

When calamity strikes, how do you respond?

Affliction, like few other experiences, reveals who we really are deep inside. Do we bear the crosses God calls us to carry contentedly, or do we wave our fist at Him and complain?

Perhaps no other episode in history more powerfully illustrates both reactions than the real-life story of Job, recorded in the Old Testament.

From the first three verses of Job’s book, we learn that he was “blameless and upright, one who feared God and turned away from evil” (Job 1:1) and that he “was the greatest of all the men of the east” (Job 1:3). Not only did Job possess impressive wealth and authority, but God Himself declared that there was “none like him in the earth” (Job 1:8) due to his sterling character.

Yet in a remarkable turn of events, God permitted Satan to destroy Job’s wealth, take his children’s lives, and plague his body with terrible sores (Job 1:6-2:7).

After witnessing him be struck with these shattering losses, Job’s wife voiced what is an extreme, though not uncommon, response to great suffering: “Do you still hold fast your integrity? Curse God and die” (Job 2:9).¹⁴ Job wholly rejected this contemptuous outlook, and his answer to his wife reflects where our hearts should be when we face painful trials: “Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?” (Job 2:10).

Job correctly understood that we have no right to question God’s sense of justice when He sends hard times our way. Second-guessing His agenda is unacceptable. Rather than complain, we should praise Him in our darkest hour. After being deprived of nearly every earthly thing he held dear, Job had the courage to do just this when he humbly proclaimed: “. . . the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD” (Job 1:21), later adding: “Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him” (Job 13:15).

As time wore on, Job grew frustrated and proceeded to question why he faced such affliction, even as his three visiting friends pummeled him with criticisms.¹⁵ Coming in a whirlwind, God answered, but His response was to assert His absolute sovereignty rather than give reasons why the suffering had occurred: “Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell Me, if you have understanding” (Job 38:4).¹⁶

This side of heaven, we may not fully grasp why certain hardships befall us. We can nonetheless rest assured that — unlike the pagan gods worshiped in antiquity — the One True God does nothing capriciously;¹⁷ He does what He does to bring greater good to His people and glory to Himself.¹⁸

Rather than trust in our own strength, He wants us to depend on Him for our every need. The Apostle Paul echoed this point as he wrote of the cross he was called to bear, a “thorn in the flesh” that God chose not to remove:

And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure. For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me. And he said unto me, ‘My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong. (2 Cor. 12:7-10)

Though we may be besieged by brutal woes, it’s heartening to acknowledge how adversity draws us closer to God, as the psalmist attests: “It is good for me that I have been afflicted; that I might learn thy statutes” (Ps. 119:71).

However difficult it may be to fathom, Christ, the Son, modeled this truth in relation to His submission to God, the Father. While it must be acknowledged that the Second Person of the Trinity is in need of nothing in His heavenly majesty, there was a way in which, during His earthly sojourn, He benefited from His agonizing trials. Thus notes the writer of Hebrews: “Though he were a Son, yet learned he obedience by the things which he suffered” (Heb. 5:8).

Bowing to the Father’s will, Christ “became the author of eternal salvation” (Heb. 5:9), and His prayer in Gethsemane is one we should draw from when hard times come: “Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done” (Luke 22:42).

Be Content with God’s Timing: Lessons from the Hall of Faith

There are many noble desires we pray for, and yet discontentment with God’s timing to bring them to pass often leads to disaster. Rash and faithless decisions are a common error that results.

Desperate for Deliverance: Moses’ Murderous Act of Discontent

Moses’ life provides a pointed example of this. As far back as Abraham’s time, God promised that He would lead the Israelites out of Egypt with a mighty hand (Gen. 15:13-14). Not content with God’s timing, Moses acted rashly. Desperate to free the Hebrews from slavery, he killed an Egyptian taskmaster and paid a heavy price for this wrong choice (Exod. 2:11-15). Stephen’s sermon in the book of Acts offers helpful insight into his presumptuous error:

[W]hen [Moses] was full forty years old, it came into his heart to visit his brethren the children of Israel. And seeing one of them suffer wrong, he defended him, and avenged him that was oppressed, and smote the Egyptian: For he supposed his brethren would have understood how that God by his hand would deliver them: but they understood not. (Acts 7:23-24)

Though we aren’t told the full details, Moses already knew, at this early point, of his calling to lead his people from Egyptian bondage. Yet he took matters into his own hands and was “sent out to pasture” for forty years. It wasn’t God’s time, and it wasn’t God’s way to bring this deliverance about.

As we all well know, Moses led the dramatic Exodus from Egypt four decades later, but his attempt to jump ahead of God early in his life underscores the lesson we must learn: that discontentment with God’s timing can easily lead us to make bad decisions.

Desperate for an Heir: Abraham and Sarah’s Discontented Sin with Hagar

Yet another example of such impatience can be found in Moses’ ancestors. God promised Abraham and Sarah a son through their union (Gen. 15:1-6), but as years of barrenness followed, they grew tired of waiting. Desperate for an heir, Abraham took Hagar for a concubine, which led to the birth of Ishmael and much strife thereafter (Gen. 16).

When God reaffirmed His promise many years later to give a son through Sarah’s womb, she “laughed within herself” in disbelief due to her old age (Gen. 18:12). God rebuked her, and yet His words were those of profound hope: “Is any thing too hard for the LORD? At the time appointed I will return unto thee, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son” (Gen. 18:14).

And so it came about: “And the LORD visited Sarah as he had said, and the LORD did unto Sarah as he had spoken. For Sarah conceived, and bare Abraham a son in his old age, at the set time of which God had spoken to him” (Gen. 21:1-2).

Despite God’s kindness in keeping His word to Abraham and Sarah, the Middle East remains in turmoil to this day because of their unwillingness to wait on His perfect timing.

The Hall of Faith Considered: All Had to Wait for God to Fulfill His Promises

As we take inventory of our hearts, we need to step back and consider this probing question: What is the common denominator of the great men and women of faith found in the Bible? The answer is no mystery: They had to wait a long time to see God’s promises fulfilled.

Read Hebrews 11 — dear brothers and sisters — then read it again. This chapter showcases a host of God’s faithful servants who believed that “faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen” (Heb. 11:1). Even those who saw profound breakthroughs of blessing during their lifetimes did not witness the complete fulfillment of God’s promised redemption. We must not miss this point:

These all died in faith, not having received the promises, but having seen them afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them, and confessed that they were strangers and pilgrims on the earth. (Heb. 11:13).

Stop and consider this: If we desire to be used as these heralded saints of old were, and counted among their number, should we be disappointed if God calls us to wait for key developments in our personal lives to come about? Who are we to think that we should have an easier walk than they did? How presumptuous can we be?

Here’s the good news: Abraham, Sarah, and Moses are all three found in this great hall of faith; so — thanks be to God! — there is hope for us in our failures to be content.

Taking all this to heart, let’s trust God’s timing and soldier on in faith.

‘Can’t Get No Satisfaction’: King Solomon and the Rolling Stones

“Hell and destruction are never full; so the eyes of man are never satisfied.” (Prov. 27:20) 

Looking back at the 1960s, a decade where restless youth rebelled in droves and age-old norms were tossed aside, the Chicago Tribune’s Greg Kot pointed to one song as a “turning point . . . an era-defining hit that also transcended its time” — the Rolling Stones’ smash single, “(Can’t Get No) Satisfaction.”¹⁹ In it Mick Jagger mocked the older generation’s priorities and moaned that he couldn’t have intimacy with a girl because she was in her period.²⁰ Because of its sexually suggestive lyrics, the song was initially banned from play in the United Kingdom, but it soon rocketed to number one anyway in Great Britain, as well as in the US.²¹

It’s easy for us now, more than fifty years later, to view this defiant anthem of discontent, and the era that surrounded it, with self-righteous scorn and to miss how even those immersed in godly culture and blessing can fall headlong into selfish discontentment. Yet this is precisely what happened to King Solomon, Israel’s monarch when the nation was at its high point of cultural achievement and international renown.

As a young man, Solomon started his reign well, asking God for an “understanding heart” so that he might wisely govern Israel (1 Kings 3:9). He then dedicated his efforts to complete his father’s vision to build a glorious temple to Jehovah that was one of the wonders of its age.

Rivaling David in the splendor of his reign, Solomon’s amassed such great wealth that he made “silver in Jerusalem as stones” (1 Kings 10:27). His literary output was likewise staggering. Writing 3,000 proverbs and 1,005 songs, his wit and wisdom became legendary. Attracting noted dignitaries from afar, Solomon once hosted the Queen of Sheba who proclaimed to him in astonishment, “Thy wisdom and prosperity exceedeth the fame which I heard” (1 Kings 10:7).²²

Despite his famed wisdom and wealth, as well as his vast literary and cultural accomplishments, King Solomon plunged into grievous discontentment. Nearing despair, he sought fulfillment by plumbing the depths of philosophy, the arts, and beyond (Eccles. 1:16-17; 2:4-6). He raised large herds of cattle, built spectacular gardens and orchards, and surrounded himself with the finest musicians of his day (Eccles. 2:4-8). He took to bed with hundreds of women to try to sate his sensual desires (1 Kings 11:1-3).

Yet none of these grand pursuits brought him satisfaction. The more impressive his feats grew, the more lean of soul he became. This disturbed exclamation reflects his pathetic emptiness: “Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity” (Eccles. 1:2).

Thankfully, God’s grace broke through Solomon’s dispirited malaise and brought him back to his senses. Even as he was set straight, he made a point to plainly spell out the antidote to discontentment for all who would come after:

Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man. For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil. (Eccles. 12:13-14)

As simplistic as it sounds, the answer goes back to what we’ve said already — that true contentment flows from a proper understanding and willing acceptance of who God is and who we are in relation to Him. Only when we bow before our Maker, with due reverence, and obey Him sincerely, will we find true peace.

What hope this truth should bring us: “The fear of the LORD leads to life, and whoever has it rests satisfied . . .” (Prov. 19:23).²³

What’s Needed for Contentment: God’s Grace to Humbly Fear Him

Looking again at Jeremiah Burroughs’ definition, we must remind ourselves that this issue, at its core, is a heart matter: “Christian contentment is that sweet, inward, quiet, gracious frame of spirit, which freely submits to and delights in God’s wise and fatherly disposal in every condition.”²⁴

With this reality in view, we need to honestly assess where our hearts really are. Are we merely putting on a “happy face” to please others, or are we truly content in the deepest recesses of our being?

Note Burroughs’ sober charge:

Contentment is not only that we forbear from discontented and murmuring expressions with perverse words against God and others. But it is the inward submission of the heart. . . . Not only must the tongue hold its peace; the soul must be silent.²⁵

Without God’s grace, we will never achieve such a posture. Yet with His aid we can.

So even as we should voice Mary’s humble prayer — “Be it unto me according to thy word” (Luke 1:38) — we should sincerely pray that of David’s: “Teach me your way, O LORD, that I may walk in your truth; unite my heart to fear your name” (Ps. 86:11).

May God grant us hearts so to do.